Sunday, 7 March 2010

I should cocoa

There I am just woken up, groggy, head full of cotton wool, tasting remnants of drool. I'm a bit wobbly, half of me is still in my sweaty dreams, the other half out into the cold sunshine-filled hallway.

I am staggering to my small office as I’ve always done since the Cat took up residency on the computer chair to say good morning to her before I continue on with my toilette. And boy do I need my toilette time first thing in the morning. I have drool to wash off remember?

Anyway, I know what to expect – the Cat sprawled on the chair, asleep.

Except that this time she wasn’t sprawled. She was nestled against the back of the chair with her legs tucked under her body and her head hanging over the edge of the seat. I mean literally hanging, neck downwards, lolling, floppy - as if the carpet held something fascinating for her to watch.

Except her eyes were closed and her body was very still.

She’s never slept like that before. Never.

The strange thing was that for a second I was so scared to touch her in case.

But I forced myself to.

Of course she startled awake and screamed at me for waking her up but Gordon Bennet, my heart

So what do I do after to calm down? I bake.

But because my heart defibrillated and near enough stopped after the shock, I decide to open my lovely little muffin recipe book “Everyday muffins and bakes – 112 essential recipes” and go straight to the section “Healthy Options”.

I pick “Sugarless Chocolate Muffins”. And because I’ve never been let down by this book, I do exactly as the recipe asks. Big mistake.

The “Chocolate” is strictly cocoa only. And pure cocoa is not sweet. The moisture is unsweetened orange juice – which equates to bitter orange.

You throw in a handful of blueberries – but as we all know, they ain’t that sweet either.

So I end up with 12 brown bitter muffins that as far as I’m concerned do nothing for the advancement of humankind.

What do I do? I buy a couple of bars of cooking chocolate, melt them and pour the yummy goo very liberally over each muffin. Problem solved.

In the meantime, the Cat is liking her new sleeping position. Go figure.


Niki said...

Oh goodness you gave me such a fright! lol Is quite comical the sleeping positions of cats :o)

KarenG said...

Great story! And I like how you decide to save the muffins instead of throwing them all out. Cocoa, no sugar, OJ and blueberries?? What were they thinking??

Love Meow said...

Cats just keep surprising us everyday. I suck at baking, so I don't attempt to bake unless there is someone there to take charge of the whole thing. i am usually the assistant in baking.

fairyhedgehog said...

Poor Kitty! Such a shock! I'm glad she was really OK.

Oh, for healthy no-sugar food, I use xylitol. Unsweetened cocoa just isn't edible!

Kea said...

That would have given me heart failure too!

I like dark chocolate, prefer it over milk chocolate, about 70% to 75% cocoa. But it needs a wee bit of sugar! Those muffins seem particularly disgusting. LOL. Sweetened with some applesauce, maybe. What a strange recipe!

Susan Fields said...

I am sooo glad to hear your cat is okay. Just reading your post about made my heart stop, too! I'm impressed you made your muffins from scratch. I love to bake, but if I don't have a boxed muffin mix, I'll opt for cereal. :)

Theresa Milstein said...

How scary. If she wasn't sick, you probably wouldn't have worried. My cat sometimes hangs her head off the edge of the love seat, and I can't imagine it's comfortable. Do you think cats get kinks in their necks?

I'm sorry the muffin recipe was a disaster, though you found a clever way to make it work.

By the way, you gave me a lovely picture of the drool!

(Word verification is "hugast", so here's another hug!)

Old Kitty said...

Hi Niki!

Tell me about it!

My fave is the Cat on her back, paws in the air! Awwwwww!

Take care

Old Kitty said...

Hi KarenG

Yay! It's Xena! Aw Xena truly rocks!

I thoroughly agree about this muffin recipe. Never again.


Take care

Old Kitty said...

Hi Love Meow

Cats do don't they, the silly loveable creatures!

Oh I can't be the assistant at baking - I'm too bossy!


Take care

Old Kitty said...

hi fairyhedgehog

ooh! thanks for the xylitol link! I've bookmarked it so will have a proper gander later!

As for the silly Cat - aw I'm sooooo glad too!

Take care

Old Kitty said...

Hi Kim

Oh Kim! First the Cat nearly gives me a heart attack and then the muffins! I near enough spat it out!

Oh I used a really milky choccie - I think it was 45%! I must try the darker one soon!

And I thoroughly agree - a very strange weird recipe - never again!

Take care

Old Kitty said...

Hi Susan Fields!

I used to use boxed mix recipes! But after a few successes with baking from scratch, I'm now thoroughly addicted!

Aww the Cat says "meow" and a big hello to you!

take care

Old Kitty said...

Hi Theresa Milstein

Awww and a big hugast to you too!


I love your love seat! I want one!!

Take care

Pat @ Mille Fiori Favoriti said...

PS Glad kitty was OK! Cats do find the oddest comfortable positions to curl up into!

Pat @ Mille Fiori Favoriti said...

Good save! I never could understand the concept of healthy baked goods...give me butter and sugar anytime. :-)

Ann said...

I bet cat just did that to keep you on your toes!

It sounds like you saved the day and remedied the sugar free muffin dilemma. Write a little note beside that recipe, add sweetened juice and chocolate!